Grim In Deed

Motherless
Avaricious
Noxious
Daughterless
Yecch:

You were a wicked willowy woman,
Like one of Lowry’s matchsticks;
I wanted to snap you in half
But then,
There would have been two of you.
Like Grimms’ evil creation
And with an air of perfection,
You nonchantly swept
Into my childhood
And steam rollered
Your way through,
Flattening my dreams.
For a twig, like my stick insect
You wielded some power.
‘Why are you here?’ I asked
But you never answered.
To me you rarely spoke,
Just hurled a constant icy glare
At my constantly wet face.
Your purse favoured Gucci,
Neat lines, nothing out of place,
(Like Audrey eating breakfast-
But I liked her).
Sharp cuts, no creases,
You dressed like my dolls,
Though always in black and white.
Had you a number instead of a name
It would have been One.
Everything matched in your life,
But me.
I was your antithesis
As I grew, yet I gained no power.
With no fruits born from your orchard
You picked at and stripped
Me of my own blossom,
By inserting those exquisite red talons
Like claws stuck in their prey
Digging deeper and deeper.
But you splintered your nails
When they hit your brick wall.
As steadfast as I could, I stood still.
But you
Kept on and an on
Sucking my early years from me
Until I was as desiccated as my mum.
Oh how I ached for her, (Mum why did you leave me to this?)
Instead, I got my nightmare.
I hurt looking up to you
And I pained for nothing.
Mismatched mother,
What did I do wrong?
I remember most vividly
The colours you chose,
For me though, not you:
Bright pink on brown,
Big circles that shimmered
Like raindrops in puddles
Or when my tears splashed.
Yellow and green
Was not my colour either;
What was in your head
Stepmother,
Dressing me like wallpaper?
Purple and blue squares
As sharp as your tongue,
You made sure you covered me
From head to foot
And not just with poor clothing.
Little things to please you
Failed as pathetically as my attire.
Was I really that bad,
Or just another layer
Of your life to be peeled away
And discarded
When you tired of my monotony?

You stole my life for a while
But I fought back,
And survived you.
That makes me victorious.

Many years have passed
And your image is strong.
Now and forever black and white,
Disintegrated to ashes and dust
Yet here I am, strong.

I can blow you away.
I have wanted to do that forever,
I have finally succeeded.